Locanto Panama

Locanto.com.pa

    Ever heard that Panama’s biodiversity is about 3 times more than the US, Canada, and Europe combined. Said to be a beautiful country, their women are nothing to scoff at either. Their food their drinks, their women and their beaches are a combo made in heaven. Of course, if you’re like me then I already know what you’re thinking. It’s something along the lines of, wouldn’t it be so much better to have Panamanian women suck you off while you travel, then you’ve come to the right place.

    If the idea of booking a Panamanian escort helps you then keep reading, cause I'm about to tell you about a site that helps connect you to escorts that are ready to rock your world. Here’s my Locanto.com.pa review.

Painfully Mysterious

    Location is an international classified ads website where anyone can post an ad about absolutely anything. So, it’s not a surprise that there’s an escort subsection under Personals and Dating. However, unlike dating apps, you barely get any information about anything at all.

    This is one of my biggest complaints about this site. First of all, there is no mention of prices absolutely anywhere on any of the 27 ads in one of their “favorite” locations under personals. They all ask you to call them at a number if you’re interested. But you know what, I'm not interested anymore. We’re paying you so we can have an enjoyable experience and not have to call people up and ask them how much for their cunts.

    Anyway, the average prices here should run you about USD 80-130 per hour, and maybe even free if you’re a gay dude but more on that later.

Drier Than 80-Year-Old Vagina

    The Panama version of Locanto or Locanto Panama is where you can find escort ads and requests posted by people. However, ads here are not much like the ads on other sites. It has male, female, and trans escorts though, so you can still find at least a few profiles that suit your sexual preference.

     Right on the landing page of this website you have to choose between the different locations in Panama. Pick whichever location is closest to you and then you’ll be redirected to a page displaying different categories of ads. To view, escort ads find Personals and Dating and look for escorts under that heading.

    Escort profiles lack images. I think I only saw about one escort ad with one photo. That too all covered up! And oh god don’t even get me started on how descriptive the escort profiles are. It’d blow your mind. It’s as if you jerked off the entire school year and showed up to an examination. You know no answer other than your name, date, and what kind of exam it is. And just like that, all you find in the escort ads here is their name, the fact that they’re an escort, and their contact info.

    Ironically, I saw more requests of dudes wanting to suck a dick for free than escorts offering to be fucked for money. There are also repetitive ads so there are even fewer than 27 ads if you think about it.

    Since the escorts don’t include any info except their contact number so there’s no reason to stay on this site for more than 5 mins. Just get the number and contact them outside of Locanto. If you’re planning to contact them that is.

    So, to summarize escorts lack details, images, and any intention of making this easy for us. Especially since there isn’t an option to switch languages either and the default language for this site in Spanish. Luckily google translate works so it’s not completely useless. But I'd rather use a hockey stick to fuck their escorts and make them stay away from me. My dick deserves better.

Locanto Escorts Caught Lacking

    Ever taken a look at a Locanto Website? We'll they’re all the same and have the same dumb features in the same site design. There’s an option on the top right corner to switch between different countries. A login/sign-up tab at the top right side with a search bar in the middle. There’s also a short paragraph of text towards the bottom that’s telling you how to best use their shitstorm of a site.

    This site is unbelievably average in features and unprofessional in practice. Completely useless and unremarkable lacking incredibly important site features and replacing them with additional annoyance through spam.

What I Think of Locanto Panama

    All I have to say here is that you don’t deserve to put yourself through the trouble of using this site. I know we enjoy sex but it isn’t worth the trouble. Especially when there is a much better option in Panama available to you. You should check out pa.skokka.com, which is another Panamanian escort site. Although it's not perfect either, it still bounds away from the disgrace this site is.

    You should check out my review of pa.skokka to see if that escort site will suit your needs or not. Though I have to tell you, the web designers of the escort sites in Panama need to step up their game. If their only options are Locanto and Skokka the people, I feel sorry for the people currently in Panama.

    So go on and go look at another website cause there’s no way in hell I'd ever recommend you look for an escort at Locanto. If you are still interested checkout pa.skokka and my review on it. In any case, if you have any love for yourself, you’ll take my advice and go away. There’s nothing worth seeing here.